How to Survive a Long Distance Relationship

Wow! You did what?! How did you do it? That must have been hard!

These are just some of the reactions we receive when people find out that Greg and I committed to an overseas long-distance relationship for 4 years. 15,288 kms (9,500 miles) between us, but who’s counting. 😉

"Distance means so little, when someone means so much." - Tom McNeal.

Window Seat Photo #1 by Maree Richardson

Whether you and your partner are commuting between countries, states, or towns, distance is distance, no matter how large or small. Over the years, many people have asked for advice on surviving a long distance relationship. Here are some common suggestions that arose:

1. Sweet Surprises 
Send each other gifts every now and again, for Birthdays, Valentine's Day, or simply "just because".  It could be sexy underwear, a personalized stubby holder, a golden rose, you name it.

2. Communication
This may sound cliche, but communication is KEY to any successful relationship. Be open and honest with your partner. Keep it natural and unforced. Talk when you want to talk, not because you have to. In difficult conversations, approach your partner calmly and respectfully, ensuring you listen to and acknowledge their ideas and point of view. You might learn something.

"Our separation of each other is an optical illusion of consciousness." - Albert Einstein.

3. Explore Different Platforms for Communication
Capitalize on all of this amazing technology that we are offered today. FaceTime and Skype are life-savers! Text messages and phone calls are great, but don't forget about the old hand-written letter. So romantic! Who doesn't get excited by personalized letters in the mail?! Much more satisfying than bills, I say. Other ideas include cute cards, drawings, photos ... get creative!

4. Plan your Next Visit
This gives you both a common goal to work towards, and something to look forward to. It increases the excitement as you count down the days until you get to see your partner, from triple digits to double digits to single digits. A bit like an advent calendar!

"Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation." - Khalil Gibran.

Window Seat Photo #2 by Maree Richardson

5. Sacrifice 
Relationships are all about give-and-take, 50-50. However, at some point in time, one person may need to contribute a little more to make things work, such as packing up and moving to a new town, state, or country. Remember to be patient, and keep things in perspective. The favor may be returned.

6. Trust 
This is so damn important. Don't be clingy and controlling. Don't send text after text asking where your partner is. Stay cool, man! If you are in an honest and trusting relationship, than both partners should be allowed to do what they want (within reason), to go where they please (within reason), and be trusted. If you cannot trust your partner, than perhaps they are not worthy of you ...

"I believe in the immeasurable power of love; that true love can endure any circumstance and reach across any distance." - Steve Maraboli.

7. Long Distance Dates
Have you ever tried to "Netflix and chill" simultaneously via long distance? Our fabulous Insta-friends Erika and Dale introduced us to Rabbit, an App that enables you to sync your Netflix with somebody else's around the world and chat to each other long distance. A total game-changer. 😊 Obviously it's not as good as the real thing, but you do what you gotta do, right?!

Window Seat Photo #3 by Maree Richardson

8. Enjoy Time with Family & Friends 
Make the most of your time with family and friends, as you may never have this much time to spend with them again in your life. Their company may help to keep you happy, positive, and distracted from feeling sorry for yourself.

"How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?" - A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh.

9. Money 
They say money does not mean anything. Well, it kinda does! [insert Russell's voice from Rules of Engagement]. Particularly if you partner lives overseas! Airfares are not cheap! You may need to work an extra shift or second job to make the money to visit your partner. I worked in a coffee shop (and I hate coffee!), and Greg worked the night-shift at Walmart (and he is a morning person!), until we could save enough money to purchase airline tickets to visit each other.

10.  Celebrate!
Even the little things. 1 month on the countdown? Celebrate! Next visit booked? Celebrate! Ya know what I mean. And yes, it is totally viable to "wine and dine" over FaceTime or Skype.

"You can't just give up on someone because the situation's not ideal. Great relationships aren't great because they have no problems. They're great because both people care enough about the other person to find a way to make it work." - Unknown.

Window Seat Photo #4 by Maree Richardson

If you're looking to add a little spice, or needing some reassurance, hopefully some of these suggestions were helpful.

Side note: Greg and I have now been together for 8.5 years, so we must have been doing something right. 😉

Please share your thoughts and ideas.

What would you recommend to others who have just commenced a long distance relationship? How did you and your partner get through the tough times?


Have a great week!


Maree

Florida's National Parks

Hi, folks!

One aspect I love most about the U.S. is its National Park system.  I am borderline obsessed!  I have read Lonely Planet USA's National Parks from front-to-back, and love to daydream about potential National Park trips to take during my work holidays and long weekends.

Florida is home to three (3) U.S. National Parks, which will be the focus of this post.

On a long weekend in January I attended a one-day work conference in Miami, and spent the following two days down south to explore the following:     

Biscayne National Park

Biscayne National Park is 95% underwater, and thus holds the record as the largest marine park in the National Park system.  There is a short, paved walkway and boardwalk alongside the water, although to really appreciate the beauty of this park, it is best to get out on the water, whether that be by boat, kayak, paddle board, snorkel or dive.  Entrance to this park is free!

I spent one day at Biscayne National Park, and took a boat tour to Boca Chita Key.  The guides were very knowledgeable and taught us lots of fun facts about the parks' ecosystems, and also about the somewhat dark history of Boca Chita Key and its lighthouse.  We were given an hour to walk around the Key and climb the stairs to the top of the lighthouse.  The view from the top was amazing!  The wind was so strong that it blew my sunglasses off!  You could also see the stunning Miami skyline in the distance.  I would love to return to this park someday to snorkel/dive the coral reef.

View from the Lighthouse - Boca Chita Key - Biscayne National Park
Photo taken by Maree Richardson

Top of the Lighthouse - Boca Chita Key - Biscayne National Park
Photo taken by Maree Richardson

Miami Skyline from Boca Chita Key - Biscayne National Park
Photo taken by Maree Richardson

Everglades National Park

Everglades National Park is the largest subtropical wilderness in the U.S.  The wetlands cover a large portion of southern Florida, and are home to many plant and wildlife species including the Florida panther, the manatee, and of course, the American alligator and crocodile.  Additionally, the Burmese Python, an invasive species, are said to roam these waters. 

I took the Shark Valley entrance and spent one day at Everglades National Park.  It was Martin Luther King Jr. Day, so entrance was free that day, however it is usually $25 per vehicle.  I biked the 15 mile trail and was astonished at the number of alligators sunning themselves on the side of the road.  Never had I been that close to wild gators before!

In my opinion, the right-side of the trail (if you're looking at it from the Visitor's Center) was the most scenic with a larger variety of plants and visible wildlife.  At the half-way point there is an Observation Tower.  Most people returned the same way they came, however I was curious to see what was on the left/opposite side of the trail.  I had most of it to myself ... for a reason.  This side was long and challenging, with numerous twists and bends.  I rode into a strong wind and felt lactic acid building up in my legs.  At one point I thought that the Visitor's Center should be around the next corner, however was disheartened to see the mile marker on the road indicating I still had 5 miles to go.  Needless to say, I made it to the end, but it certainly tested my physical and mental abilities! 

Sorry, Mum! Look how close the alligators were to the road.
Everglades National Park. Photo taken by Maree Richardson.

Staring Competition! Everglades National Park.
Photo taken by Maree Richardson.

Soaking up the Sunshine. Everglades National Park.
Photo taken by Maree Richardson. 

Dry Tortugas National Park 
I have not yet been to Dry Tortugas National Park, but it is on my list!  It is approximately 72 miles offshore, thus is only accessible by boat, ferry or seaplane.  A couple of years ago we were in Key West and had planned to take the ferry across, however the weather did not cooperate.  Guess I'll have to save it for another day ...


Have you been to any of Florida's National Parks?  What was your experience like?

Also, if anyone has any tips for visiting Dry Tortugas National Park, please let me know. 😊


Have a great week!


Maree

10 Things I Have Learnt Living Overseas

Hi, folks!

Here is my raw and brutally honest review of things I have learnt living and working overseas.


1. The longest period I spent away from Australia without visiting was just over 12 months.  Upon returning, I felt like a foreigner in my home country.  I wandered around feeling like a naive tourist, and commented on the strong Aussie accent of passersby that I once used to have.

2. Speaking of accents, mine keeps changing! Australians say I sound American, Americans say I sound British/South African/New Zealand/German/French - some days I am unsure where I belong.  My career in Speech Language Pathology most likely contributes to my accent change, because I need to be understood by the children and parents I serve, and teach my clients how to produce sounds and words according to their dialect.  Slowly converting American children to Australians, one accent at a time ... Just kidding! 😉 When I first touch base in Australia, my friends and family say I sound really American, and make fun of me for "taking a shower to get cleaner and feel better".  However, after a day or two of immersion into my Aussie culture, I soon fall back into "taking a showa to get cleana and feel betta, maaaaaate".

3. TIP: Prepare a "catch phrase" or clever response for those times when people ask "Where are you from?".  Sometimes I feel like saying "I'm from Antarctica with the polar bears", just to really stump them.  Only on rare occasions do unfamiliar people guess my accent correctly. 

4. I love trying new foods from all different cultures.  Whenever we go on a date night, Greg and I usually choose an ethnic restaurant.  However, sometimes I have those days where I just crave a good ol' Aussie vegemite sanga.

5. Americans LOVE Australians.  They love our laid-back attitudes and accents.  We are associated with iconic legends like Steve Irwin "The Crocodile Hunter", and Paul Hogan's catch phrase "Put a shrimp on the barbie".  They also think we are tough and strong, having to deal with all of the dangerous animals that are apparently out to kill us ... please, America, have you forgotten about your brown bears and alligators?? 😉

South Beach, Miami. Photo taken by Maree Richardson.

6. TIP: Remember and/or practice entering your bank account details for your home country on a regular basis.  On one of my visits to Australia, there was an uncomfortable moment where I forgot my bank account number and password.  After entering it incorrectly a number of times, I was locked out of my bank account.  I called a representative who asked me a bunch of questions including my secret questions.  Turns out I must have answered them incorrectly, also.  After a series of hesitant "okay"'s and "a-huh"'s from the representative, she said she could not assist me at that time and suggested that I visit a branch to sort it out.  Long story short, I visited a branch and was served by the most lovely and understanding bank employee who helped me renew everything.

7. People in other countries often talk about how friendly and happy Aussies are, but I had never noticed this concept until I had been away for over 12 months.  The lady who helped me at the bank branch (from the prior story) spoke to me like a friend, and I left the bank feeling calm, warm and fuzzy (not usually how banks make one feel).  When visiting Tasmania for the first time, and aimlessly getting lost around the streets of Launceston, a friendly person working in the street stopped what he was doing, and took time out of his day to ask if we needed help and gave us directions.  So kind! 

8. It's OK to talk to strangers on planes.  This tends to happen more when I am flying by myself.  You know within the first couple of minutes of making "small talk" with the person sitting beside you whether they are in for a chat or prefer to be left in peace.  I strongly believe you can learn something from everyone you meet in life, whether they stay in your life for 5 minutes, 5 years, or forever.  In the words of Dr. Seuss, "You can learn something new everyday if you listen".

Started out strangers, ended up friends!  Rocky Mountain National Park.
Photo taken by Colorado Sightseers.  

9. Be prepared to translate everything - vocabulary; measurements; dress sizes; humor.  My temperature conversion skills from Celsius to Fahrenheit are improving, but I still use the Converter App on my phone at times.  You will often hear short pauses in my conversation when I am thinking about my audience and which word I need to use - "boot" or "trunk", "bonnet" or "hood", "jumper" or "sweater", "Autumn" or "Fall", "Primary" or "Elementary", "thongs" or "flip flops" - you get the point.  When someone asks me for my dress size, I have to convert Australian sizes to American sizes and vice versa.  There's even jokes and phrases I sometimes use that cause a confused expression on my communication partner's face, which I then have to explain what it means, and by then it has lost all meaning and humor.

10. You will STRONGLY appreciate spending time with your friends and family.  Having a specific, often short, time to spend with my best friends and family means that I am totally invested in them.  We truly make the most of quality time together and it never goes to waste (often at the expense of little to no sleep!) but the memories made are always totally worth it.  Quality over quantity.


Who can relate?


From the utterly confused and happily exhausted,


Maree

From Resident, To Citizen

Hi, folks!

After 4 years of living and working in America, transitioning from conditional to unconditional Permanent Residency, mountains of paperwork, fees, fingerprinting, background checks, interviewing, testing, and more waiting, I became a U.S. Citizen in December of 2017.  I am honored to now officially call myself a dual citizen of Australia and America.

Photo taken by Gregory Richardson.

For those of you wondering if it was worth the "hard slog" - absolutely.  The freedom to move between countries whenever I please without being scrutinized, the mental and emotional stabilization of knowing that Greg and I will no longer have to be apart for extended periods of time, and being welcomed "home" no matter which direction I travel, is a feeling like no other.

A few weeks prior, I undertook a face-to-face citizenship test and interview.  I was a little nervous preparing for the process since the test covered a variety of U.S. facts and history.  There was a bank of 100 possible questions that the interviewing officer could select from.  These questions and answers were memorized on our "hurricane evacuation road trip" up to Alabama and back!

Greg and I attended the Oath Ceremony in Tampa, Florida.  It was short and sweet, albeit heartfelt and meaningful.  There were 69 people from over 20 countries who also attained their U.S citizenship alongside me at the ceremony (although I was the only person hailing from Australia)!  It was interesting to hear some of their stories.  One man from Guatemala had been waiting 15 years for this moment - Wow!

Who else out there is a dual (or triple!) citizen?  If so, what countries are you a citizen of?

Cheers,

Maree

     

2017 in Review - Happy New Year!

Happy New Year, Friends!

Here is a brief update of our 2017.

It was a “rocky start” for us. The herniated discs in Greg’s lower spine worsened.  He ended up having back surgery in May. We were slow-going for awhile, however, with physio appointments and at-home stretches and strengthening exercises, Greg is much improved. 

Career-wise, I transitioned to working for the local School Board as a Speech Language Pathologist. I'm currently stationed at 3 different schools, and enjoy the variety of working with preschool and elementary/primary aged children.  The School Holidays will be a bonus, too! 😉

Hurricane Irma pummeled through the Caribbean and into Florida in September. We evacuated our house and drove up to Alabama to wait it out. It was a bit nerve racking waving goodbye to our house and not knowing what it would look like when we got back. Fortunately, the storm veered to the right and avoided a direct hit in our area. Our hearts go out to all those who did not fare so well.

We visited the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in Tennessee for a second time. This place holds a special place in our hearts.  I also spent one week exploring the beautiful Australian state of Tasmania with my Mum.  We experienced some of the clearest waters, cleanest air, untouched nature and the most diverse geography.  Tassie is bloody beautiful, mate!

Honeymoon Bay, Tasmania, Australia.  Image captured by Maree Richardson.

To top the year off, I officially became a dual Australian-American Citizen. After 4 long years the wait (and paperwork!) has finally come to an end and a new chapter begins.  You can read more about this in my next post. 😊

Have a great week!

Maree